My Birth Story
Hello, I'm so glad you are here! My name is Darcy Gerhart. I am a mother to two beautiful boys and wife to a wonderful husband Sean. We are Christians who feel deeply convicted that we are called to be vessels that show the love of Jesus Christ. My calling to work as a doula is something the Lord has been growing in me ever since I began my birth education journey. I used to be covered in fear about birth, but through education and surrender, I put that fear to death.
When I was pregnant with my first in 2019, I knew I wanted to have a water birth. Having limited options at the time, we decided on WellStar North Fulton Hospital. Despite having the birth I wanted, I still walked away with trauma. I had a post-partum hemorrhage and I dealt with some PPA, PPD, and developed horrible death anxiety.
As bad as all of that was, we still wanted more children. So I came to a decision, and knew I just had to rip off the band-aid and do it (no pun intended). We got pregnant quickly after we began trying, but ended up having an early miscarriage known as a chemical pregnancy. This did not help my death anxiety. I was heartbroken that I didn't get to see our baby on an ultrasound or even hear their heartbeat.
Even though I was still struggling, I shoved it down (I don’t recommend doing that) and we got pregnant the following month. Originally, I was planning on having another water birth at North Fulton- but my heart wanted to be at home. That's where I felt safe. Unfortunately, we did not have the out-of-pocket cost. So, we prayed that the Lord would provide a way and He did. I was able to transfer to a home birth around 25 weeks, and it was the best decision I've ever made.
During my labor, I was so tired and felt defeated. Then the song “No One Ever Cared for Me Like Jesus” by Steffany Gretzinger came on. The lyrics "His faithful hand has held me all this way," pierced me and I started crying.
You know how in the movies the character has flash backs on memories of their life? If you’re a Stranger Things fan, it’s like when Max was trapped by Vecna until she heard Running Up That Hill. She started to remember her life and the good times. She started to remember who she was, and that's when she could break free from the evil Vecna. Well, that's what happened in the birth tub. I was trapped by anxiety and fear, until the Holy Spirit showed up and reminded me he is with me and has never left me.
A couple days postpartum I was putting some of my laundry away and gratitude came flooding over me. It was in that moment I realized that I subconsciously thought that I was going to die in labor. But there I was putting away my laundry and was so happy to be doing it (if you know me, I have always hated laundry, just ask my husband). But all the little things I had taken for granted started to become huge for me. Throughout all my life up until that moment, God was working in me a tangible gratitude that I didn't have before. Joy, unspeakable and full of glory, was now mine.
My calling is to now live this out. To live out this joy and gratitude, share it with others, and to support, love, and care for families during one of the most sacred and vulnerable seasons of their life.
Check out my homebirth video here. Credit to Abby Johnson.
